Near Distance by Hanna Stoltenberg Review

Near Distance by Hanna Stoltenberg explores the distance between a mother and daughter, a challenging space which I have contemplated for weeks after having finished the novel. Translated by Wendy H Gabrielsen, the Norwegian novel is the first translated work of fiction published by Weatherglass Books. Mother Karin is forced to address the distance between herself and daughter Helene when she reaches out to Karin after discovering that her husband Endre has been having an affair. Karin’s and Helene’s relationship acts as the backdrop for the novel’s explorations of motherhood, identity and sexuality.

We are introduced to Karin as a woman who gives very little to all aspects of her life. She is the kind of woman who cannot hold down a relationship, but would rather keep her schedule free on a Saturday evening for a potential dating app meet-up than babysit her grandchildren. Stoltenberg provides a truly powerful introduction to a deeply complex relationship. When Helene calls in the late hours, Karin has gone home with a stranger she met at a bar. When Karin agrees to meet Helene, the episode gives a stark image of the rocky relationship between mother and daughter. Helene explains that Endre has been having an affair, and spits “You must be loving this”, exposing the deep hurt Helene has about never feeling supported or understood by her mother.

As well as exploring the present, the novel flashes back to episodes from the past. This provides further background to the long-standing distance which has existed between Karin and Helene, particularly encapsulated in the moment where Helene speaks her first words. Karin and her husband at the time, Erik, took a road trip across Germany when Helene was one year old. When Erik is out of the car, Helene speaks her first word – ‘Daddy’. What follows exposes the disconnect between mother and daughter. In a fit of excitement, Karin bangs on the window from inside the car in an attempt to get Erik’s attention from outside, so that he can share in the experience. This has the effect of sending Helene into tears, resulting in Erik having to step in and comfort their daughter. Erik’s fear at what was occurring disgruntles Karin, leading her to ask “What did you actually envisage?” – exposing mistrust in their marriage, and Karin’s awareness of her lacking as a mother.

Helene invites Karin on a weekend away to London, but what initially seems to be an opportunity for Karin and Helene to build on their relationship acts to expose further distance between the two. It is also soon revealed that the trip is an excuse for Karin to watch Charlotte (Endre’s mistress) speak at a conference, and Helene needed someone to attend with her. The most poignant episode from the trip is a personal shopping appointment the two embark on, where we see Helene form what seems to be a closer bond with their young personal shopping assistant, Rosie, than Karin and Helene share. This is amplified when Rosie reveals that she thought the two women were colleagues, not mother and daughter. However, the personal shopping trip also displays important developments in Karin’s character, where we see her recognise where she has been absent for seminal moments in Helene's life, seen in Karin's questioning of who would have taken Helene wedding dress shopping. Similarly, Helene plans drinks with old University friends from her year abroad in England. The evening seems to further alienate Karin from Helene, whilst simultaneously sparking the epiphany that Karin has never really understood or tried to delve deeper into her relationship with her daughter.

As the novel progresses, we learn that Karin herself had an affair with a young man called Finn. The revelation builds further complexities into Karin and Helene’s strained relationship, created by the parallels between Endre’s and Karin’s affairs. Stoltenberg represents the true complexities of mother daughter relationships, through both representing the anger and upset long held by Helene regarding her mother’s affair, whilst simultaneously having her confide in Karin when she is on the receiving end of infidelity.

The ending is particularly powerful, because Stoltenberg provides us with Karin’s imagined vision of Helene’s return to and reconciliation with Endre after returning home from London. We see Helene gifting Endre a quartz crystal - a ‘soul cleanser’, representing her attempts at forgiveness in embracing his world of yoga, retreats, and meditation. The ending feels hopeful, showing how Karin might see Helene’s attempts at reconciling her relationship with her mother as a step in the journey of healing her marriage. Although it is easy to harbour dislike for Karin, Stoltenberg has created a complex character, initially a woman who puts herself and her sexuality first, but the course of the novel sees her develop into a woman who wants to better fulfil her role as mother. The novel closes with Helene the next morning, where Karin’s imagined version of her daughter is showering, letting ‘the water run over her like a catharsis’, acting as a synecdoche for a release and potential healing of both her marriage and relationship with her mother. Indeed, Karin’s construction gives us hope that she truly wants the best for her daughter.

Near Distance represents the complexities of mother-daughter relationships, achieved through exposing the opposing forces of love and hate which co-exist between Helene and Karin. This novel is deeply complex, encapsulating a huge plethora of themes of which I have only just touched on in my review. What spoke to me most was Stoltenberg's representations of the tensions between female identity and motherhood, and the ways in which the two can be re-built.

Thank you to Neil at Weatherglass Books for my copy of the book.

You can purchase Near Distance here: https://weatherglassbooks.com/shop/near-distance